Each year AFM pays tribute to our fittest canine buddies. As depicted in the “most liked” Budweiser Super Bowl ad, we resonate to an animal’s gentle loyalty and companionship. Many of the entries for Austin’s Fittest Dogs included wonderful comments straight from the candidates themselves. In keeping with getting the scoop right from the horse’s mouth, I endeavored to ask my own animal crew at our home at Crackerdog Ranch what they had to say about all this hoopla.
“I’m okay with this fitness stuff as long as I don’t have to do a marathon or something; what I really like to do is ride in the car with my head out the window and my ‘doggles’ on. Laying inside in the air conditioning with my head on the windowsill watching the stupid Aussies race around all day is also pretty cool.”
Max, “the Guardian” (Great Pyrenees)
“My fitness routine is all about patrolling the barn and making sure that no zombies attack. Sometimes I chase the chickens to get some good aerobics in, but they don’t play fair when they use their wings. My human family gives me a treat every night and scratches my tummy, which I really love. But I hate getting the burrs taken out of my tail.”
Charlie, “the Sleeper” (miniature Australian shepherd)
“I get freaked about most things. I absolutely hate going in the car, and I’m scared to go through the vestibule at night to my bed. I get a good workout by sprinting with the dumb Aussies. Afterwards, I love to take naps, but I can never make up my mind where to sleep—on or under my human’s bed, or on my own bed. I’m not good at making decisions.”
Simeon, “the Squirrel Man” (German shepherd/collie mix)
“Man, I love to exercise. I run all day in my backyard, and I chase the cows, horses, and anything else that comes close to my fence. They used to freak out when I barked, but they’re getting used to it now; Sarah, the donkey, with her goofy ears, just lies down next to my fence and stares at me. What a bummer. I take my human, Janie, for a 3-mile walk every morning and I lecture her if she’s late or misses it. But the most fun is trying to catch Huey, the squirrel, who taunts me all day long, gibbering and jabbering.”
Spanky, “theLow Rider (long-haired Dachshund)
“I am everyone’s friend. I get my workout in by running around in circles, biting Cora’s feet. She can’t even see it coming and when she tries to stop me, I roll over on my back and look frightened (which I absolutely am not). I am so cute that I get all the privileges and special treatment. Though my humans call me a sausage because of the way I look, I am way cooler than any sausage and very smart. I always howl whenever someone shows up at our house, and everyone follows along.”
Blue, “the Goober” (Australian shepherd)
“I am fabulously fit and can run all day. Every morning, my sister Miki and I chase each other all around our yard. She bites my feet and pulls my ears, but I don’t care because I love her. I absolutely must get the most attention from everyone or I freak out. People call Miki and me “dumb Aussies,” but it’s a proven fact that Aussies are among the most intelligent dogs, so I must really be smart…I think. I’ll figure that out some day; in the meantime, I’m just a big, loveable goober.”
Miki, “the Climber” (Australian shepherd)
“Aint no mountain high enough…or fence or tree too big to contain me if I really want to escape! Sometimes I play in the back yard with Simeon and, while he jumps and barks at Huey, the squirrel, I just climb the live oak to get him. Huey goes crazy and runs out on branches that are too small for me, but I don’t care. I also get lots of exercise chasing Blue. If my electric collar isn’t on tight enough, I’ll jump over the fence to freedom, though I always seem to get caught. I’m really not a criminal; I just like adventure.”
Bailey, “the Talker” (Snowshoe/Siamese Cat)
“Everything I do is sleek and refined, even my exercise (which is so stealthy you never even see it). Because I am part Siamese, I am off the scale in intelligence, especially compared to my totally ignorant dog family. They attempt to scare me from time to time, but I can jump straight up in the air and swipe them with a claw before they even know what’s happening. Besides, the humans adore me; all I have to do is put out a little purr and they melt and pick me up to protect me while scolding the stupid dogs. At the end of the day, I basically run the show!”
So there you have it, a dog’s/cat’s eye view of life at Crackerdog Ranch and how our guys and gals stay fit…and you haven’t even heard from the mini cows or Zack, the Warmblood horse, or Sarah, the crazy donkey! Don’t you love our menagerie?
But don’t stop here; go cover to cover and enjoy AFM’s other marvelous “tails” of Austin’s Fittest Dogs.
Keep Austin Fit,